Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Somalian Pirates Redefine Chutzpah

It used to be that the working definition of chutzpah was the kid who after killing his parents, throws himself on the mercy of the court because he is now an orphan. Not anymore.

A fellow who goes by the moniker "Ali" and plays the role of pirate spokesman for the humble fishermen turned seaborne robbers says the world has it all wrong. We ain't no bunch of crooks with AKs and an attitude of greed. No, us pirates are just misunderstood. Here's his quote taken from SFGate http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/10/26/MN6913NSJK.DTL.
We don't know whether they are going to dump a toxin or collect marine resources, but we have to capture any ship that passes through our waters illegally. In Somalia, there is no functioning central government that can manage our waters, so we have appointed ourselves to guard our coast against foreign ships.

Well, golly, shiver me timbers, Ali. You sure had the Geek fooled along with beaucoup other people. And, the ransoms aren't really ransoms. No, the money collected for the release of ship and crew is a "fine" for littering or running over fish with malicious intent.

Yeah. Right, Ali or whatever your name is. You sure have a grip on reality--some sort of reality.alt.

Next the jolly buccaneers of the Niger Delta are going to proclaim that they aren't crooks or insurgents but simply a vigilance committee seeking to protect the delta from oil spills. And, anybody who says otherwise is a misunderstander. So, take that, UN. You ought to be applauding us and not calling for yet another international anti-piracy patrol.

Meanwhile, back in Somalia. Ali seems to have a hard time keeping his narrative neat, orderly and internally consistent as shown by the following quote regarding the tank laden M/V Faina from the deck of which he was speaking via satellite phone.
We saw a big ship, so we decided to capture it, and later we discovered that it was carrying tanks. That made us happy because we got a chance to demand more money

Not that the pirates--oops, the Geek forgot--the Volunteer Somalian Coastguard & Fishery Patrol have gotten any swag yet. Further it doesn't appear that any will be forthcoming in the near future. Tough break, Ali and the rest of you public spirited boys, but remember you all are volunteers doing this tough job out of pure love for your country.

By Ali's logic there is no need for NATO warships to protect food carrying vessels on route to the geographic expression called Somalia. The civic minded so-called "pirates" are simply taking the ships to assure more rapid and efficient delivery of critical foodstuffs to the starving people of the motherland.

Ali and assorted experts and members of the League of the High Minded all agree that the only way to stop the mirthful seizure of ships and crews for ransom is for Somalia to again join the ranks of the nation-states complete with an effective government and the institutions of law enforcement and criminal justice. Sounds good. Until you look a little deeper.

Somalia never existed as a genuine nation-state as this term is generally defined. Somalia is an artifact. Before the coming of the colonial powers, particularly Britain and Italy, the term was a geographic reference only.

The land described by the term was a loose assemblage of tribes held together primarily by a common language and religion (Islam.) Travellers in the region in the decades before the colonial powers took an interest in acquiring the real estate for assorted "strategic" reasons described a land of blood, blood feud, bloody sharia punishments, slavery, and miles and miles of nothing but miles and miles with patches of coffee bush and kif.

After the colonial powers abandoned the region, the artifact of "Somalia" came into existence. Geography gave it a measure of importance during the Cold War with the US first supporting Ethiopia in the long festering dispute over the Ogaden desert. Later the US supported the Somalian regime after Ethiopia went through a regime change installing a Marxist military dictatorship in lieu of the Emperor.

The reshuffling of governments in the waning days of the Cold War along with Eritrean independence started the process of Somalian collapse. The collapse came quickly and bloodily. The blood has not yet ceased to flow. Nor will it in the foreseeable future.

Not only has the blood been flowing non-stop for eighteen years, the artifact called Somalia has disintegrated. There are two de facto and almost de jure spin-offs of the old Somalian construct: Puntland and Somliland.

Both have managed with a fair degree of success to remain at some distance from the never ending war between Islamists, radical Islamists, the Ethiopian "peacekeepers" and the African Union peacekeeping force. Every now and then the violence reaches out and touches these two autonomous regions. Most recently in a wave of five clearly coordinated suicide bombing attacks against installations in both "lands."

The rest of Somalia has reverted to a more lethal version of what the foreign travellers saw a hundred and fifty years ago. There things will stay unless and until either the radical Islamists or the mere Islamists win out. Or, slightly less unlikely, until everyone gets sick and tired of all the meaningless destruction of lives and life itself.

The expectation that a government will arise from the swamp of blood that covers the land of the Somalis is as rational as presuming that aliens from Tau Ceti 4 will swoop down in their enormous triangular craft and spray peace, love and flower power vibes over the place.

Until the outbreak of peace arrives along with the Second Coming or some equally improbable transcendental event, the problem of piracy continues. It is a burden for the (dare the Geek be so politically incorrect as to write) civilized countries.

To quote Lenin, "What is to be done."

Urging proactive self-help as the US Navy has been doing is fine and good, but quite limited in effectiveness. Yes, ship's crews can defend themselves by evasive action and aggressive use of fire hoses as five did in the past day or so. But it is spitting in the ocean.

The naval powers represented in the region must put pressure on ship owners associations as well as the maritime risk insurance industry to require convoys. The NATO and other contingents at sea or coming to the area must provide effective escort services, particularly to vulnerable ships such as chemical or liquefied gas tankers.

Beyond that, it must be recognised that only by increasing the risks while decreasing the potential benefits can crime be constrained. Pirates must again be taught the lesson their progenitors in the 18th and 19th Centuries learned. Everyman's hand is turned against them.

Pirates must be challenged--with fire, if necessary. They must be arrested, if possible. Tried, even if it means the international community has to establish yet another one of those tribunals in the Netherlands.

Pirates must be killed if they do not surrender. This means that there is an excellent chance that non-pirates will die. Such is life--and war.

Get a grip on this. The pirates of Somalia are a legitimate target of war. They are Muslims, every man-jack of them. Most are demonstrably aligned at least somewhat with the Islamist entities that comprise the opposition in the "Global War on Terror."

While we're at it, would somebody please slap "Ali" upside the head. Chutzpah has a purely Jewish copyright and he hasn't paid royalties.

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